There comes a time in everyone’s life when he needs to make some serious decision that can very much change his fate. As a rule, if a person is aware of the difficulty of his situation, it is very difficult to make such decisions. Fateful decisions are easy to make when you are not thinking or when you do not realize that you are making a choice. What can a person who understands their situation and is faced with having to make a difficult decision find support in?
Give Yourself Time
Making any decision, even if it’s choosing a winner at 20Bet, takes time. And it’s good if we allocate it to ourselves for this purpose. In the old days, wise men would purposely seclude themselves in order to better focus on some important matter. Now the pace of our lives is so great that it becomes increasingly difficult to stop for a while and focus on something important to ourselves. And without it, making a decision is difficult. After all, it’s important to think, analyze your situation, find and be disappointed in certain decisions, reach a deadlock, and then again look for a way out of it. All of this is an integral part of finding and making a decision. And if we don’t give ourselves time, decisions can be impulsive and ill-considered, based on passing moods or the influence of others.
Relying on Feelings
In difficult situations, our minds begin to fail. Either there are so many “smart” thoughts that you can get lost in them, or the wind begins to rush through your head and your mind refuses to work. In this case, relying on your own feelings can help. Only it should not be a reliance on momentary emotions (joy, anger, fright, etc.), but on the deep feelings that live in all of us. Some people find it easy to hear the voice of these feelings within themselves, and all they have to do is listen to themselves, while others have no idea how to hear the waves of their own feelings in the noise that envelops the soul.
To begin with, find a quiet place where you can be alone. Having done this, find some object nearby on which you can focus your attention. It is better if it is some shiny object (it is easier to concentrate on it for a long time). Sit comfortably, with your eyes fixed on that object, and sitting like that, start to gradually listen to yourself. Imagine that you have an emptiness, a silence, nothing inside of you. Listen to that silence and emptiness. Don’t let your thoughts distract you from this silence. And if thoughts distract you, just note what they are about and let them go. Gradually, something will begin to show up in that void. Notice what comes to the surface. Those are the feelings we’re looking for. They may appear in the form of images, vague premonitions, sensations in the body. As soon as you notice something in yourself, try to listen to it, and let your experiences unfold.
This procedure can be imagined figuratively as follows. You’re walking through the woods and you need to get out on a road on which cars are driving. This road is far away. You walk and behind the crunch of branches and leaves under your feet, you do not hear the direction of the road. You stop and freeze to listen to where the road is. And you hear it not immediately, but only after a short period of time, when your ear adjusts to the silence and your hearing becomes acute. So it is with the senses. You must first stop and stop all inner work, and then listen to where inside you the “sound of your feelings” is coming from.
If you manage to hear the voice of your feelings, to hear your true desires, it can give you the support and direction in which you would like to move. And if this general direction becomes clear, then making a decision is much easier.
The Self-deception Test
An important guide in making a decision can be a sense of internal agreement. This feeling can appear in the opposite form, in the form of a feeling of betrayal of yourself if you refuse the decision, or on the contrary, internally insist on the need to take it. Usually this feeling is like some inner discomfort, something gnawing and torturing inside, as if you betray yourself. Ask yourself in a difficult situation: “Why am I here? Why am I doing this and that? What is the point of my decision?” If you don’t know what decision to make, it is worth asking yourself about the meaning of the situation in which you are forced to make the decision. Why are you in it? Why are you in it? By finding answers to these questions, you can better understand why you are in a decision-making or choice situation. And then you can ask yourself if you are betraying what you came into this situation for, and yourself as well, by making this or that decision.
Doubts often arise when a decision is made under pressure. If the decision is internally mature, there are no doubts and regrets. Well, if the choice is not internally mature, but it must be done as soon as possible, there is internal turmoil, confusion and the desire to find the “right” solution. In such a state any choice will turn out to be wrong. Behind such a decision there will always be a trail of regrets and doubts. There is only one way out – to think about what makes you choose and make a decision now. More precisely, what you are not satisfied with the situation in which you are now? And here it is better to think about what else can be done to remove this internal dissatisfaction, without radically changing the situation.
The best advice is not to put pressure on yourself. You should not force yourself to make a decision. Allow yourself to not take it. Relax. Resemble a samurai who stands on the edge of a cliff with an unshakable spirit and looks at the blue sky, enjoying its beauty. Take your time and allow yourself in a relaxed state of mind to look at the situation for a while.
Humility With Sacrifice
In every choice, in every decision, you are, in one way or another, forced to give up something. There is something important and valuable that must be sacrificed when choosing this or that alternative. It’s worth being prepared for. To experience sacrifice more effectively, you must approach it with an awareness of what it is that you are losing. When you are clear about what you are giving up, it is easier to live with the consequences of making that difficult decision.
To better understand what you have to give up, try to finish this sentence inside yourself: “I will never again…”. By talking inside yourself about everything that you have to part with, you can, on the one hand, better understand the importance of this or that alternative and, on the other hand, gain the courage and willingness to take responsibility for the decision made. One way to help you accept this sacrifice is to be aware of what you are paying for in the form of the benefits you are giving up. It is your choice, and for every choice we make in life, we have to pay something, and sacrifice something for something more valuable to us.
The Bottom Line
To give your decision more weight, you need to “pump it full of energy.” How do we do this? There are two options here. On the one hand you can take one of the alternatives that you want to give up, and imagine the worst possible scenario. You can do it by saying to yourself the following words: “If I choose this or that, I will suffer the whole life from this or that.” You can do it this way.
Or you can find that positive thing that’s in the choice you’re leaning toward and keep it in your mind, in your imagination, keep it as a goal that you want to lead your ship to. You can think of the good things you are striving for more often, especially in moments of doubt and hesitation.